Since this blog is my journal as well as my scrapbook, I had to write about my new calling as Gospel Doctrine teacher. Luckily, I team-teach with another guy, so I only have to teach every other week. But, this calling has been far more humbling than I expected. You see, I love teaching. I have taught gospel doctrine before in a student ward, I also taught Relief Society for two years, and I mean I'm the offspring of Brent L. Top--it should be an intrinsic part of my DNA. So, I wasn't nearly as intimidated by this calling as I should have been. With each lesson I have become increasingly more nervous and self-conscious. That doesn't even make any sense! It has just brought out some of my weaknesses and personality pitfalls. (For those of you who know me well, these won't come as news to you.) For example, I talk TOO MUCH and TOO FAST. Most of that is because I am nervous, but it is also that I have been learning so much in my study of the Doctrine & Covenants and the history of the church that I just want to share it all. But, I also am trying too hard to prove how much I know about the subject matter. I just want to be taken seriously by all the old men in the class. I am trying so hard to be a great teacher, that I am forgetting to really let the greatest teacher--the Spirit--take over.
I also have to admit that I need to be better about leading the class in a discussion rather than just talking the whole time. But, if any of you have a ward with a lot of elderly people you will understand what I'm about to say--I'm sort of afraid to open it up to comments too much because they sometimes say the weirdest things. That scares me a little. I know, though, that the people in the class need to be included in the discussion because each of us receives our own insights from the spirit, and we each have different experiences and perspectives that can enhance the doctrines. So, I'm trying to do better.
Those are just a few of my weaknesses. I guess I am grateful for the new experience and the challenge. It really is humbling me so much. i have to keep being reminded that this class is not about ME it is about HIM. I am, however, so grateful for this because it has scared me into reading my scriptures and studying the gospel more. I guess I had to be compelled to be humble. I hope I can keep doing better, but at least I know I'll be blessed just for trying.
3 comments:
I would love to be in your ward and sit in on one of your lessons. You do have the Top gene, you need to give yourself more credit.
I hear ya on the weird comments...I'll never forget it when, during a provident living lesson, taught by the second counselor who happened to be a financial planner, an older gentleman went off on how purchasing stocks and investments is just like gambling and therefore against the teachings of the prophet. Ho boy, that was interesting!
And I will be in your class (when not in Primary or the Mothers' room)!
Way to go..now I feel guilty for calling my 9 and 10 year olds the devil children!
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