For Nick

My #2 child has been swinging back and forth between the funniest, cutest little angel to a screaming, tantrum-throwing, waking up in the middle of the night, little devil. It's either his age (2, of course) or his adjustment to new baby. Either way, it's quite an adventure. He totally cracks me up and totally makes me crazy, depending on the day. So, here are a few good ones of the little devil (or angel.

He fell asleep like this. Awesome!

He insists on wearing his hoodie and beanie to bed most nights now.

Don't you just want to eat them up after they take a bath! They are so clean, sweet-smelling, and their faces are booger-free!

It ain't easy being a middle child. (I know.) Nick is so hilarious, and smart, and determined! I'm sure he just needs attention. Someday, I'll have more time to devote to him. . . .right?

MY TURN!!!

I may never be able to blog again. My 2-year-old is completely obsessed with playing computer games. Yes, he's only 2 and he loves the computer--what is the world coming to! So he wants to be on it all the time. Whenever I try to be on it he throws a huge fit or he climbs on my lap while I'm typing and gets in my face. Naturally, since the little guy discovered the computer, my 4 year old suddenly has a desperate desire to play on it which causes constant fights over, "It's my turn", "No, it's my turn." The only way to stop the insanity or to limit their computer time is to just turn the damn thing off completely! So, here I am, up way later than I want to be (10:15pm--pitiful I know), just so that I can have some "me" time. This is more like a journal entry blog--just the musings of Tiffany.

I need to publicly apologize to anyone (mostly my older sister) whom I have ever judged for having what I deemed a messy home. I'm suddenly so humbled because I suddenly realize how it gets that way. There are some people who genuinely don't care and don't even try to clean. . .but, I would bet that most women want a clean home and it just gets so stinkin' hard to keep it clean once you have more than 1 child. Housekeeping feels like a hamster wheel--running, running, exerting so much energy, never getting anywhere. My house is even quite small, and the more stuff we cram in here the messier it seems. It is so cluttered it just never seems clean to me. I also hate leaving dirty dishes in the sink at night because then you wake up to a stinky kitchen, and then it seems to make the whole house smell bad, and then it takes a lot of concerted effort to make the house smell decent again. And. . .I swear there have been very few nights lately when I didn't leave dirty dishes in the sink overnight. (Probably only the nights that we went out to dinner.)

Sometimes I just feel like I am working all day long cleaning, doing laundry, meal preparation, feeding the baby and when my husband walks through the door at 6pm it probably looks like nothing has been accomplished. (Luckily, I am blessed with a man who doesn't comment about it, even if he does think that.)

The moral of the story is twofold--first, humility, the older I get the more children and life experiences I have, the less judgmental I am. Secondly, is, a plea for mercy-if you ever come over to my house and it smells bad, or you see me in public in sweats without makeup, or my children come to church with dried boogers on their faces and teeth not brushed-please don't judge me harshly. I really am working my butt off to keep everything together. And truth be told, sometimes I don't try at all because I'm just too tired to care!

CAVEAT:
**My husband doesn't let me complain, he believes that it only attracts more negativity to you. So, if you want things to be wonderful, you have to speak as though they are wonderful. So since I just complained a lot, I have to balance it with some positives:
*Ruby is smiling so much and cooing more and more. She's adorable.
*We are so blessed that we can afford a nice (yet modest) Christmas for our kids.
*Michael still has a job in this troubled economy, and I can stay at home.
*I only have about 10lbs left of baby weight to lose. (Although, I'd really like to lose 20 lbs to be back to my 25-year-old, pre-children weight!)
*I have a nice home (even though I want a bigger one because I am selfish and shallow), but it is warm and filled with love and laughter.

Does that count as some good positivity! Will that keep the universe balanced in my favor. Because I gotta tell you, sometimes I just want to vent and complain and feel sorry for myself but I don't want to be consumed by it.

SHOUT OUT:
Something else I've been thinking about. . .and I have to hurry and fit it all in now because I may never get another turn on the computer again. . .is how many cool women I've been getting to know lately. Although, the sad truth is, that most of my friendships lately consist of reading their blogs and sometimes posting a comment.

I especially want to shout out to the women of the Orchard Ward. I've been in this ward for 2 years and I'm just really now starting to feel really attached and a part of this ward. There are so many of the women whom I think are so cool and I'd love to get to know them better. I'd love to be "friends" with them. But, I mean, how as a grown up mother of 3 do I make new friends?

Back in my youth, I usually bonded to my friends in one of 3 ways--
1)We would have some really long, late into the night, deep, philosophical discussion about love, life, womanhood, and the pursuit of happiness, that sort of thing.
2)If I thought you had friendship potential I would invite you to go dancing with me--your ability to keep up with me, and avoid the advances of overly anxious guys who were looking for something to grind up against would be your test.
3)We would go out to eat. Naturally.

I'm not really sure how to be friends with new women. I rarely spend time with the friends I've had for years, I rarely spend time with one of my sisters, and yet I hate feeling isolated and homebound. (My anti-social husband doesn't help the situation.)

So, to all the great women, particularly those of you in my ward, consider a blog comment or a post on your Facebook wall as a gesture of friendship. I read your blogs and follow your lives. . .so I guess that's the way I can have some sense of friendship now that I've got 3 kids and no dancing skills!

There's Something About Ruby

There have been a lot of cute pictures taken of my kids in their little lifetimes. (My first child has about 5 times more pictures of him than any of my subsequent kids.) But, I got Ruby's portraits done this past week. . .and it changed me forever! My boys are cute, but this little girl melted my heart in a way I have never experienced. There's just something about my little red gem in her little red dress! I love having a daughter.

Yes, of course, she needed a red dress--her name is Ruby! This will be her blessing dress. (I've never been one for the standard white blessing outfits.) And speaking of the name Ruby. I have a complaint! When I looked at the SS name index to pick a name, "Ruby" was ranked like 157th in 2007. I thought I was picking a name that was classic, timeless, and NOT TRENDY! But, since she has been born I have heard of 3 people who have named their newborn girls "Ruby" within the last 2 months. I'm going to be very disappointed if it suddenly becomes very popular and trendy. It is completely beyond my control. My sister said that has happened to her 3 times with the names she picked for her girls. One of her daughter's is named Giselle. . .she was born over 3 years ago and it seemed like a completely obscure, even weird, name back then. Then the movie "Enchanted" comes out, and suddenly we're hearing of babies being named "Giselle" a lot these days.

I guess it's not too late to change Ruby's name. She's only 2 months old, and we haven't even blessed her yet. I could pick Gertrude or Bertha--I'm pretty sure those names won't get trendy. Just kidding! I'm too in love with the name Ruby, it was meant for my girl! Even if there will be 5 Ruby's in her kindergarten class. . . .there will ever only be one her!

BFF's

When you were a little kid did you and your best friend talk about what you hoped it would be like when you grew up? The two of you planned to marry twin brothers, live next door to each other, have kids the same ages who would also be best friends. Well, me and my best friend, Sheree (my friend for going on 20 years) have inadvertently coordinated our lives so well that it is comical!

We both just had our first daughters, Ruby and Jordyn. The two babies were born 5 days apart. We have matching outfits for them, so we had to dress them up and take a picture of them together. Sheree's baby, Jordyn, is probably at least 2 lbs. bigger than Ruby--but, Ruby is 5 days older!

Sheree and I also each have 2 sons ages, 2 and 4. Our first babies were also born 5 days apart. Both times this has happened Sheree was due 2 weeks before me. . .but, both times I beat her by 5 days! Here is a picture of Gavin and Ashton (our first babies) at about 5 months old.
Our second children, Nick and Ty, were born 6 months apart. So, even with those two our pregnancies overlapped a little bit. But, we have never, ever, ever planned our pregnancies together. We've never even consulted about it. We've never even said, "I'm thinking about getting pregnant." None of that! We've had babies 5 days apart TWICE. . .and it has been perfectly accidental.

We even lived across the street from each other for almost 3 years while I was living in my parents' house during their mission. That was completely unplanned, too. Now, I have moved--but only about 6 blocks away.

Unfortunately, I still don't see her nearly as much as I would like to. Despite our perfect coordination, there are things you really can't plan or control. Like, our husbands. They are not twin brothers, in fact, they're not even friends. When we were first married we tried to get them to hang out and be friends, but you just can't force those things.

Now that our boys are getting older, we're realizing that you can't necessarily force your kids to be best friends either. Ashton and Gavin are dispositioned very differently, so they don't always get along. Ashton always wants to tackle and wrestle. . .and Gavin is just not down with that!

But, I feel so blessed to still be such good friends with Sheree after so many years. She and I have always been very different, and yet somehow managed to be YIN and YANG and benefit each other with our individual strengths. At this point in our life, she and I have so much in common it is easy to be friends. Especially these last 7 weeks, we have commiserated with all of our postpartum struggles--sleep deprivation, sore breasts, juggling 3 children, etc. I don't even have to make excuses or try to be positive. . .I can say nothing, and just cry, and she completely understands!

The only bad thing about our friendship, is that we don't get to hang out together enough--especially without our children! I told her someday, when we're done having babies, and our kids are older, she and I will go on a cruise--just the two of us.

And wouldn't it be amazing if Ruby and Jordyn really could be BFF's from birth?

Your blogs

Obviously, I changed my format. I was just bored and wanted to mess around, but didn't have anything interesting enough to write a post about. Well, anyway, I lost all of my blog links. I added the ones I could remember off the top of my head. So, everyone visiting please leave me a comment so I can get the link to your blog.

To the 3rd Power

I have definitely been slacking on my blogging because I am still trying to master the adjustment to having a 3rd child. It is more than just children X 3. . .it is chaos X 3. . .it is laundry X 3. . .it is stuff X 3. . .demands X 3. . .food X 3 (they never seem to stop eating.) So, my life has been turned upside down and I feel like it is more than just everything X 3. . .it is actually exponentially increasing my workload and my stress and my exhaustion. . .hence it is life to the 3rd power!

First things first. Here are a few pics of Ruby Doobie (as the kids call her.)

My little pea in her pod.

Am I mean because I think this crying picture is cute. She actually doesn't cry very much (except at 3am.)

Ready for church.

Ruby is doing well. I am having the typical struggles with a newborn. She eats all the time and doesn't sleep well at night. I always stress about nursing and wonder if my babies are getting enough to eat because they are so small and don't grow very quickly. But, I think I've finally mastered it (on my 3rd child.) Although, I can't guarantee I'll stay exclusively nursing once she can hold her own bottle. . .it's just too tempting to give her a bottle and free myself up.

The boys are adjusting really well (including Mike.) Gavin is proud of his new position as Mom's Best Helper. He really is so helpful and obedient. He asks me just about everyday, "Mom, am I your best helper? Better than Nick?" Yes, Gavin. Except yesterday he said, "Mom, you really should pay me for being such a good helper. Give me your quarters and dollars." We might need to have a talk about true service.

Nick is delightful and hilarious. He has gotten so good at entertaining himself (because he has been neglected by me for months now.) Just today he was playing with a long piece of string that could turn into a space shuttle, a gate, and a waterfall. so imaginative! He's already adapting to his place as middle child. For the sake of journaling, not bragging, I must also mention that he can recognize all of his ABC's, numbers, a few shapes, and about 6 colors. Brilliant child! I totally can't take credit for his acquisition of so much knowledge at such a young age, because like I said before, he's been neglected for awhile. He is just drawn to all the stuff that Gavin's been learning and doing. My favorite little Nick phrase is "No pwobwem (No problem.)" Instead of saying "okay" or "yes", he will say "No pwobwem!" I love it!

It is good for me to write these little anecdotes about my cute kids. My husband pointed out to me that I have been talking so negatively lately, like everything is terrible. And, in actuality, nothing is bad except my nights without sleep. Mike and I are both so much busier with taking care of kids, but he said, "I kind of expected that would happen with a third kid." Well, duh, why hadn't I been looking at it that way. I am truly blessed to have 3 healthy, happy, smart, adorable, beautiful children. I'm so glad I have a husband who is willing to step up and help me with everything that needs to be done (except laundry because he doesn't know how to use our front loader.)

Alright, so here is where I will stop. . . . . .inhale. . . . .exhale. And once again remind myself that these kids will grow up so quickly. I don't want to just white-knuckle my way through their early years. I want to stop, watch, laugh, enjoy, and burn the images into my memory of these delightful little souls exploring the world.

If you have more than 3 kids you are probably laughing at me. If you have less than 3, I hope I have not discouraged anyone. In the words of Garth Brooks, "Even at the worst, it ain't that bad!"

My McDreamy

I have been making my husband grow out his hair for the last few weeks and I have to say I really love it! He is so blessed to have such a gorgeous, full head of hair. It takes a very special head of hair to pull off the "McDreamy" and my man can! It still needs to grow out a little more on the top, but it should only take a few weeks to reach its full potential. So sexy! For those of you who don't watch Grey's Anatomy and you don't know what I am referring to when I say "McDreamy" hair. Here is my inspiration:

I love that Michael is secure enough in his manhood to rock some product in his hair. I mean, the key to McDreamy hair is all in the styling and products! Oh yes, and a big shout out to Stephanie his stylist. Yes, he officially has a "stylist." Sorry but Fantastic Sam's just won't cut it when your wife has such lofty ambitions for your hair.

I love that my man is willing to humor me. My mom doesn't like it very much. She thinks that Janey makes her husband grow his hair out too long, and pretty soon she will probably think Mike's hair is too long. I guess that's just the Former Mission President's wife in her. She wants her sons to look like missionaries! But, I think Mike's hair is sexy and yet still professional and priesthood-holder appropriate!

The Primary Program

I have been looking forward to having a Sunbeam in the Primary program for years!!! So, today my Gavin had his debut in a Primary program. I just had a baby two weeks ago, but I did not want to miss it. So, I actually got myself and Miss Ruby ready and to church by 9am. That was no easy feat, and I did not feel great doing it, but I just couldn't wait to see Gavin in the program. He knows the words to almost all of the songs for the program, so I was hoping he would sing his little heart out.

So, here's the reality of how things went down.
First, my sweet, little Sunbeam spends the whole program crying. I don't even know why. He stayed on the stand, but just kept crying. He would stop crying long enough to sing the songs, but whenever they would sing a song, there were older kids standing in front of the stand completely obstructing my view of Gavin. Honestly, I couldn't see him at all! The adorable Sunbeam I've been dreaming of for years couldn't even be seen. When I could see him he was crying his little eyes out. I couldn't believe that I actually got up and put makeup on for that!
But, it gets better (or worse):
So, Nick was having a "day." He totally flips out with excitement when I come into church with Ruby. He is like climbing on me, climbing on her carseat, beside himself trying to get to her. It was like a wrestling match trying to keep him off of her in that little pew. He was also so excited to see Gavin on the stand. So, he kept standing up yelling, "Hi Gavin!" Then, he stands up on Mike's legs puts his arms out and yells, "Superman!"
Nick, then decides he wants to be with the other kids. So, he walks up to the front gives our neighbor kid a high 5. . .and turns around and yells, "Hey Mommy wave at me!" Then, he starts running all around the chapel. I had to take him to the hall after that and he never stopped pitching a huge fit until after the program was done.

So, thus ends my first Primary program with my child in it. I'm so disappointed. It was such an exhausting blur. I'm definitely going to have to skip church next week to compensate!

Two Weeks

Ruby is 2 weeks old now. I'm just so darn tired. I haven't written anything on the blog for nearly 2 weeks, also, because I am so darn tired. Ruby is an angel who sleeps most of the time. I have had tons of help with my boys. So, I have had lots of time to rest and yet I am so darn tired.

So, until I can be a little more clever, or at least a little more coherent--I will have to make this a purely pictorial post. So, here are some pictures of my little "gem."

The Agony & The Ecstasy

The Ecstasy:

Ruby Elizabeth Wilson came into the world on Wednesday, Oct. 8th at 5:07AM! She weighed 6lbs 9oz, 18 inches long, and much to my surprise, she was born with a head full of brown hair! She is beautiful and angelic and her brothers just want to hold her and kiss her all the time.

The Agony:

For those of you who like to hear all the miserable details of labor and delivery, I will recount them now. For any of you who read my previous blog entry, you know that I've been feeling miserable and especially anxious for the last week. My due date wasn't until October 23rd, but both of my boys were 2 weeks early. . .and I just knew it was getting really close. My body was so ready. My doctor has been telling me for more than a week that I was getting so close and progressing so well. . .which actually made things seem slower.

Anyway, at my 38 week appointment on Tuesday, the doctor tells me that he doesn't think I'll make it to my next appointment. He says I am so close and he decides to go ahead and strip my membranes. For any of you who have experienced that, it is miserable. I felt horrible the rest of the day. I felt nauseous and was having really severe contractions. As yucky as I felt, I got anxious and thought I was having some progress. So, my Mom and I decided to go walking up by Bridal Veil falls to help send me over the edge. Well, during my walk I actually felt much better and stopped having contractions. Darn it. I went to bed without any contractions.

At 3AM the following morning (Wednesday), I suddenly wake up because I think my water broke. It was just a little bit, I wasn't even sure what had happened. I didn't even feel any contractions. . . .and then it hit me! It all progressed so quickly. I was just going to wait and hang out as long as I could stand it. I hadn't even awakened Michael at this point. But, then it started happening so quickly that I had to act fast. I packed my bags, called my Mom to come over, woke up Michael, and headed off to the hospital by 4AM. I let Michael stop at Walker's to get a drink, I thought we had plenty of time (my labor with my last child lasted like 15 hours), but by the time we got to the hospital, which is like 8 mins away, I was screaming in pain. The contractions were so fast and long and horrible. It seemed to take forever for them to assess me and decide I was actually in labor. Come on people I need drugs!!! It was getting to be unlike any labor I had ever before experienced. It was horrible! I was screaming and crying and the nurses had to teach me how to breathe, even how to scream. (Apparently you are supposed scream at a low pitch, and grunt, rather than high pitched squealing.) So, the anesthesiologist comes to give me my epidural, and I was shaking so hard and crying and the nurse had to teach me some lamaze breathing technique so that I wouldn't bear down too soon. Well, in the process of prepping me for the epidural they realize that the baby was coming out and I did not have time for an epidural. So he decides to give me a spinal block as quickly as possible. Even though it was happening so quickly, there was no way in hell I wanted to do it naturally. Before my legs were even completely numb, I was pushing the baby out. (My doctor didn't even have time to get to the hospital.) The baby's heart rate started dropping, so they just had me push nonstop as hard as I could. The doctor called for forceps. . .that freaked me out, so I pushed my little guts out and she finally popped out! (Forceps weren't needed afterall, but I did have a major episiotomy.) I had pushed for less than 5 minutes--about 55 minutes less than my previous baby. It was crazy and awesome!

I actually consider it a much harder and more painful labor than anything I had ever before experienced, but it went so fast! It kind of left me and Michael both in shock. We were like, "Seriously, that's it? We did it?" And yes, there are many who might say, "You could've done it naturally. The drugs only worked for the last 10 minutes." But, that spinal block was like a gift from God. I shudder to think of what it might have been like to do it "naturally." I experienced more labor than I'd ever intended to. I can not believe that women have done this "naturally" every day since the dawn of time.

So that was my agony. I thought it was frightening and awful, and I behaved like a deranged lunatic. But, you just can't beat a two-hour from start to finish labor and delivery. Ruby and I both came through it healthy and happy.

She is so tiny, even her newborn size clothes don't fit.
This one looks a lot like baby pictures of me. Her hair almost looks red in this picture, too.
They never leave this poor kid alone. She has already been smooshed, smashed, poked, licked, nearly stepped on, etc. . . But, someday they will be the ones protecting her!

P.S. For those of you who participated in my blog poll "Vanessa vs. Natalie"--I apologize that your input was not needed or even considered. The name Ruby just kind of hit me a week or so ago, and I fell more in love with it every day.

More Talking, No Pictures

So, my efforts to document my cute children's adventures and post more pictures of them and to talk less about myself didn't last very long. They are cute, I even took pictures of them on Gavin's little field trip yesterday, and yet all I really feel like doing is talking.

It is really, impossibly hard for me to think of anything else right now other than getting this baby out! Technically my due date isn't until the 23rd, but I think it really needs to happen this weekend. My other babies were two weeks early, so I figure I'm close enough. Next weekened is extremely inconvenient for everyone in my extended family (whom I need to care for my boys), and Michael really doesn't want to have a baby in the middle of the week. I do not think I can last much longer. I feel like I'm going crazy inside this oh-so-uncomfortable body of mine. I'm having constant contractions. . .but, they say that can go on for weeks! Seriously?!?!

How can I make time go by faster? Every day has slowed to a crawl. The nights are long too because I wake up constantly in pain, or to go potty, and can't get back to sleep. I need something to look forward to each day. But, I just feel like I'm waiting, waiting, wondering, waiting. It is starting to cause me a lot of anxiety.

I'm sure I must have felt like this with each of my pregnancies, but I can't remember it. Right now it seems like this is the absolute worst it has ever been--the most pain, the most contractions, the most restlessnes, the slowest days in the history of the world.

I guess I can't complain. I don't know how women must feel who have gone over their due date. I've never even made it to 39 weeks before. It just seems unbearable to actually make it to my due date right now. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH! Any suggestions, anyone?????

McDonald's

I swear we do not eat at McDonald's that often. Okay, we do eat fast food more than I wish we did. . .but, I didn't realize how prominent a role McDonald's was playing in my kids' life until my 2 year old turned over my laundry basket and turned it into the McDonald's checkout counter. He came up with this all on his own.

First he took the order. It always had to be "chicken nuggets, fries, and chocolate milk."

Next, he swipes Dad's credit card.

Then, he picks up the food from the side.

Finally, he gives Dad his order.

I actually found it a little disturbing how well he knew the "drill." Such a terrible reflection on me. But, it was really cute and very imaginative. I was impressed!

Less Talking, More Pictures

Is a blog more of a journal or a scrapbook? That is my dilemma. I spend a lot of time talking about myself, my thoughts and feelings, and probably need to focus a little bit more on the real stars of my show--my kids! I do enjoy writing and "waxing verbose" about a lot of things, so that will inevitably continue. But, at least today, I'm just going to show off some fun stuff!
Gavin's first day of school. It's not exactly a milestone, since it's just another year of preschool. He even has the same teacher again this year. But, nontheless, he was very excited! His preschool is now at the new PG Rec Center which is only about 3 blocks from our house. So, I walk him to and from school everyday. And yes, even 3 blocks sends me into contractions!

Now for some pictures from some of our end of the summer mountain adventures. The big boys--Daddy, Gavin, Uncle Brian, and cousin Oakley--braved the cold and snow on Labor Day to go jeepin' through the mountains! Crazy! They felt so manly that they had to go Cabela's aftwards and eat Buffalo and elk meat.

Me and Jessica wouldn't venture to the mountains until it was at least 25 degrees warmer. So, we took everyone last weekend for a picnic and to let all the kids take turns going on jeep rides with Mike. It was so fun, but you can definitely feel Fall in the air up the canyon. I hope we can squeeze one more "adventure" in before it gets too cold.

THIRTY

My husband says that I'm only as old as I feel and that I am making myself old by feeling old! It's not that I feel old, per se, although being 30 and 8 months pregnant does sort of make me feel like my body is falling apart never to be the same again, but it is that there is something really odd about crossing that threshold into 30!

I actually love everything about being 30. I like who I am now so much better than at any previous age. I would never, ever want to go back to 20. I think, for the most part, I am exactly where I wanted to be by now--great husband, 2.5 kids, a nice home, my dream job (SAHM), the only thing is that I do not have my college degree. (But, there's plenty of time for that.)

The weird thing about being 30 is that it's the official entry into complete adulthood. I'm no longer a peer to the 20-somethings. All of the college students are so much younger than me, the hottest pop stars and actresses are younger than me, 1/2 of the news reporters on local news are now younger than me, and everyone on reality TV shows (America's Next Top Model and such) seem like bratty little kids to me.

It's just weird! It's weird that I've had some friends for 20 years or more. It's weird that this is the 4th presidential election that I have been of voting age. It's weird that I've worn the same shoe size for 15 years.

But, it's also awesome to have 30 years worth of a great life behind me! My heart and mind are so full of happy memories, funny memories, wisdom gained, lessons learned, life-changing events, and so much love and friendship and joy! I feel blessed to be healthy, I feel blessed to have an amazing husband (over 1/2 of my life was spent worrying I would never get married), and I'm so blessed to have healthy, smart, and extremely cute kids. (I'm sure I'm not the only person who ever hoped their kids would be not just healthy, but cute too!)

And last, and definitely least important, is that I'm better looking now than I was at 20, too! I hope I can say the same thing about 30 when I'm 40!

Cute Revisited

I had to add this one to go with my last post:

Yesterday, I said "Nick, buddy, you've got diarrhea." Nick said, "I-Re-Ah? . . . .Ee, I, Ee I, Oh?"

Still laughing about that one!

Cute Stuff

This is just an assortment of cute pics and funny stories that I want to remember.

Gavin said, "Mom I know you have a baby in your belly and that's why it is getting so big, but if Daddy doesn't have a baby, then why is his belly so big?"

Nicholas went to his 2-year well child appt., and the Doctor said that the only way I'll ever get this kid to eat is to get rid of the bottle. Believe me, I know this, I've just feared dealing with the hassle. So, the Doctor looked at Nick and said, "No more bottle, you're a big boy." So when we got home Nick threw away all his bottles and he hasn't had one in several days. Whenever he gets really tired, and I know he really wants his bottle, he'll start saying to himself, "Doctor said no more babas, I big boy!" He's being so brave. . .but it's working! Now, I don't know what I'll do when I have to get him to stop sucking his thumb!

These are cute pictures from a trip we took to the Hill AFB aerospace museum. My boys, especially Mike, loved it! It was a reward to my husband for going to our family reunion in Idaho. We got to eat at the Burger Bar (it was featured on the Food Network), and go to the museum. I believe in positive reinforcement for both children and husbands.

Therapy

The last few days I have been thinking, okay obsessing, about something. It is starting to hurt my brain and hurt my heart. The more I obsess, the worse it seems to feel, and there is no easy or obvious solution. I thought about blogging about my "issue" in order to receive validation and support from all my girlfriends. I'm such a talker, I could just talk and talk about the same thing and rehash it a million different ways, but I've ultimately decided that I have to find a way to STOP obsessing, and hopefully stop hurting.

So, I've decided that I need to distract my brain. I do feel the need to have some kind of talk therapy, to cope with my overwhelming emotions, but I've got to approach it from a different angle. I'm going to spend a little time musing , so here goes. . .
I thought about "counting my blessings" and decided even that was a little too much to handle. So, I'm going to talk about random things I love, you know, like raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, that sort of thing:
-Cherry Coke from Will's Pit Stop--I have tried just about every Cherry coke fountain drink in all of Utah County. I know exactly which gas stations have Cherry Coke. I have been a connosieur since high school, and Will's Pit Stop on University Ave has the best stuff.
-Taking trips to the dump. I just completely love getting rid of crap! It astounds me how much stuff we accumulate. My husband hangs on to the weirdest stuff. I just love cleaning up the yard, the garage, the storage and then just dumping it into a giant pile at the local landfill. It always makes me so full of gratitude that some people are willing to be garbage men and run the landfill. It really is such an integral part of modern society!
-Makeovers, especially with a dramatic change to my hairstyle!
-My husband's perfect eyebrows
-My kids' fake laughs--of course their genuine laughter is beautiful, but I love when they really ham it up just to humor me!
-Walking into my Mom's house--it always feels like home, as soon as I walk through the door, I feel like I can exhale for a moment, & dump some of my burdens on someone else a little.
-Good TV shows on DVD--just watching episode after episode for a few days straight.
-Songs that remind me of my days as a Dance Club Queen. Janey tries to get me to dance now, but I just feel so old and goofy. I'll be telling my children (and my husband) for years to come, "I used to be known for what a great dancer I was, I even won contests. I promise, I used to be so cool. "
-Sobbing, really letting go and letting it out. (I cry a lot, but I usually try to hold back and make it stop quickly.)
-Laughter through tears (that's from Steel Magnolias), such a girl thing. Men look at that and think we're schizophrenic!
-Tulips. . .I tried to grow some in my own yard and the deer ate them all as soon as they bloomed, it broke my heart.
-Compliments on my appearance. I mean, I love any kind of compliments, but the ones that appease my vanity are really delicious! As someone who has always felt uglier than my sisters, and my friends, it just thrills me to hear anything that implies that I'm pretty, sexy, or stylish! Pathetic, I know.
-Making out with my husband. Such a rarity! Sometimes I miss the days of courtship when we couldn't get enough of each other and we made out for hours.
-My kids accomplishing a task by themself for the first time. They are so proud!
-Actually doing those things on the "really-should-do" list, like exercising and reading my scriptures!

I could go on and on. I feel so much better already. It has been a fun distraction. For those of you who are reading, share one of your "favorite things" with me, it is therapeutic for me and you!

The Last Sha-Bang!

So this is a post about our summer family reunion, which is a pretty common, even annual thing for a lot of families. But, for my family it is a pretty big deal. We don't see my extended family (my aunts and cousins) very often at all since our grandma died, most of them I haven't seen in years. So, it was really neat that several of my Idaho relatives made an effort to come down to the reunion for the day. I always love to show off my kids! It was really fun. . .and they all cook really well, so the food was great! But, it was also an amazing feat that we got the whole Top family, all of my siblings and their children, there too. This month has been so crazy, because Jessica (my oldest sister) just moved here a week ago with her 7 children. I just met her two adopted children from Africa for the first time, her husband is still on duty in Georgia, and they have been in-transit for like a month. So, despite her exhaustion, she stilled hauled all 7 kids up in her "Training School" van to the reunion in Downey, Idaho. It is also amazing that my brother (Justin) and his family came, because he just got back from being in Navy training for 3 months without his family, and then they were in the process of getting ready to move to Florida in like 5 days.


The most amazing appearance of all, was that I actually got my husband to come! He hates to crawl out from under his rock, leave the security of his DVR remote, and actually have to talk to people. . . .but, he was a SUPER star at the reunion! I couldn't have survived without him. Nick stayed within arm's reach of Dad at all times, because sometimes he gets really frustrated by being accosted by 6 little female cousins at one time!











(Chloe, Gavin, Gwynyth, & Sophia)







Gavin told me he likes hanging out with his oldest girl cousins best of all!





Gavin's first time ever roasting marshmallows! (I know, I'm such a poor excuse for a mother that it has taken 4 years. I'm just not a big camper.)



Gavin's first time eating a roasted marshmallow! Sorry, Janey, if you're still mad about all of the smores and marshmallows being gone by the time you got there, you have this culprit to blame!

We all let Don & Janey watch the kids, since they don't have any of their own yet. I hope it's not a deterrent to procreation! Here they are with 4 of Jessica's kids and 1 of mine. BTW, my sister Janey does not normally dress like a hooch, she just came from the water park.

We never got the kids altogether at once to take a picture. The reason this post is called the "Last Sha-Bang" is that it was a big party for all the cousins to be together before 3 of them (Justin's kids) move. It was a fun opportunity for everyone to get to know Jessica's new kids, Diamond and Florence better. We don't know when we will all be back together again. Hopefully sooner than later! Jessica will only live in Utah for 15 months, and then she's off to who-knows-where. So, this was a great way to end a great summer and the great, yet short, time we all got to spend together as a family this past week.

For those of you who are wondering, trying to keep track here is the count for the Top family:

Jessica--married to Brian Simons, 7 kids--Oakley, 11, Chloe, 10, Gwynyth, 8, Florence, 6, Sophia, 5, Diamond, 5, and Giselle, 3.

Justin--married to Katie Abbott--3 kids--Caleb, 5, Alyssa, 4, Elijah, 2.

Me--married to Mike Wilson--2 (almost 3) kids--Gavin, 4, Nick, 2, and due in October with a girl.

Janey--married to Don Kaufman--2 years of marriage, no children yet.

I love my whole family! Thank you everyone for coming. Thanks especially to Mom & Dad for putting it all together, doing all the cooking & cleaning, sleeping in the teepee with the kids, and footing the bill! I really did have a blast. . .and I'm so grateful for the memories my kids are making with their cousins.